Newsgroups: alt.politics.usa.misc,alt.politics.reform,talk.bizarre, talk.politics.misc Subject: New Political Party Date: 7 Oct 92 18:56:29 GMT Keywords: Rich, Liberal, Greedy, and proud Summary: Looking for a platform Followup-To: alt.politics.usa.misc,misc.test,alt.politics.kibo,rec.pets, talk.bizarre,talk.politics.misc In response to the lack of any variation among the candidates for this year's U.S. Presidential election, a group of concerned citizens in the Los Angeles area have founded a new political party, the Liberal Materialist Party. Just as the central ideals of the Democratic and Republican parties are protection of personal rights and protection of property rights, respectively, the Liberal Materialist Party has a central ideal which motivates our stand on many issues: We want to save the world, but not with our money. To show how this ideal is applied to real issues, here are some examples: RAIN FORESTS: Stop the destruction of rain forests by having Michael Jackson buy the entire Amazon basin as his own personal zoo. WORLD HUNGER: Require that all owners of private jets make at least one monthly food run to a designated third world country each month. EDUCATION: Free education though the graduate level for all students who desire it, financed by mandatory 50% inheritance taxes on all persons holding over a million dollars in cash, goods, investments and properties. NATIONAL DEBT: Pay off the national debt by a 5% surcharge on all profits of corporations making over 10 million dollars per year until the debt is payed off. Of course, corporations owned by members of the Liberal Materialist Party will be exempt from this surcharge. I think you get the picture. If you want to take part in this revolutionary new bastion of political expression, you may join the Liberal Materialist Party by sending the following to me, John Perry, care of UCLA Computer Science Department: Your Name Your Address Your Phone Number A check for 10% of last years gross income We of course will see to it that your contributions go toward financing the lavish^h^h^h^h^h^h spartan needs of the party organizers. Hope to hear from you soon. John Perry National Chairman Liberal Materialist Party P.S. With the election right around the corner, we still need to choose a good write in candidate for president. We were considering Jerry Brown, but he already dropped out of the race. Ross Perot already has a party so he's out. We're thinking maybe Jane Fonda. Your suggestions would be appreciated -- v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^- "Reality is a sandwich that I did not order." Zippy the Pinhead (for president) ^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v-^-v- This post is copyright © 1994 John Perry. Any rebroadcast or republication is prohibited without my expressed written consent. Write to me with your comments or usage requests |