New Political Party

Newsgroups:   alt.politics.usa.misc,alt.politics.reform,talk.bizarre,
              talk.politics.misc
Subject:      New Political Party
Date:         7 Oct 92 18:56:29 GMT
Keywords:     Rich, Liberal, Greedy, and proud
Summary:      Looking for a platform
Followup-To:  alt.politics.usa.misc,misc.test,alt.politics.kibo,rec.pets,
              talk.bizarre,talk.politics.misc


   In response to the lack of any variation among the candidates for this
year's U.S. Presidential election, a group of concerned citizens in the
Los Angeles area have founded a new political party, the Liberal Materialist
Party.  Just as the central ideals of the Democratic and Republican parties
are protection of personal rights and protection of property rights,
respectively, the Liberal Materialist Party has a central ideal which
motivates our stand on many issues:  We want to save the world, but not
with our money.  


  To show how this ideal is applied to real issues, here are some examples:


RAIN FORESTS:

   Stop the destruction of rain forests by having Michael Jackson buy the
   entire Amazon basin as his own personal zoo.

WORLD HUNGER:

   Require that all owners of private jets make at least one monthly food
   run to a designated third world country each month.  

EDUCATION:

   Free education though the graduate level for all students who desire it,
   financed by mandatory 50% inheritance taxes on all persons holding over
   a million dollars in cash, goods, investments and properties.

NATIONAL DEBT:

   Pay off the national debt by a 5% surcharge on all profits of corporations
   making over 10 million dollars per year until the debt is payed off.  Of
   course, corporations owned by members of the Liberal Materialist Party
   will be exempt from this surcharge.


I think you get the picture.  If you want to take part in this revolutionary
new bastion of political expression, you may join the Liberal Materialist
Party by sending the following to me, John Perry, care of UCLA Computer
Science Department:

   Your Name
   Your Address
   Your Phone Number
   A check for 10% of last years gross income


We of course will see to it that your contributions go toward financing the
lavish^h^h^h^h^h^h  spartan needs of the party organizers.  

Hope to hear from you soon.


                                      John Perry
                                      National Chairman
                                      Liberal Materialist Party


P.S.  With the election right around the corner, we still need to choose a
      good write in candidate for president.  We were considering Jerry Brown, 
      but he already dropped out of the race.  Ross Perot already has a party
      so he's out.  We're thinking maybe Jane Fonda.  Your suggestions would
      be appreciated
-- 
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    "Reality is a sandwich that I did not order."
			       Zippy the Pinhead (for president)
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